Virtual Perfection Cowboy – Stoned Ape :: Indie Shuffle

This track is flirty with a twist. The twist being that the object of one’s flirtation is not man. Oh yes, you heard right — not man, but rather, mushroom. After sufficient consensual courting, you take it out for dinner — wine and dine it — and when you return home, you play Virtual Perfection Cowboy’s “Stoned Ape.”

By this point, you have played your cards so right that you’re in for a night of sheer wonderment. The song plays on repeat, bringing a smile to each side of your face. By which point, you ponder how strange it is to have two sides of one face and how bizarre it is that the back of your head is, in essence, blind because your eyes are in a strictly monogamous relationship with the front of your head, also known as ‘the face.’

As the night winds down, you scoff at ‘the face’ because you have formed an alliance, out of compassion, with the back of your head. “Stoned Ape” is still on repeat and you’re totally content knowing the night has been filled with good music and new revelations that you may or may not remember by morning.